I am back at work, it has been 4 days and I can not seem to get it together. I have made stupid mistakes with a few of my groups and it is nothing life savings but it still is a big deal for them.

I know my mind is elsewhere, I really just want to get back to New England. I am flying up in another week for an interview in Maine. I have stated that relocation must be part of the package, but you never know what they are thinking. I am now very worried and most likely will be until I can get up there. If they have changed their minds, I hope they let me know before I go all the way up there and they have already hired someone.

Believe me, I never thought I would be one of these people who can not handle death, but this has hit me so hard. I barely can concentrate on my work, making rookie mistakes. It is as if I am back to square one, my husband thinks it will get better as we progress. I am not so sure, my heart is not into this, personally, I don't care if your room is set up wrong, get over it.!! You ordered it one way then changed your minds tough crap!! Was it on time? Was everything else you ordered all set?

I have become a bitter person, an need to snap out of it, or no one will hire me for anything in this industry. I have been talking to Thomas lately, he is sorely missed. It is an empty whole in my heart, an I know time will help, but right now I feel LOST!!

I am back from CT an the funeral of Thomas. I feel empty inside, nothing is nice, or happy, or pretty right now, what does it matter without him in the world?

I know I need to snap out of this funk,I can not seem to control my emptiness or the fact he is gone. I know it will hit me, when I go to call him about something that has happened or when we go back up to CT for a wedding at the end of September and he won't be there to go out for drinks or dinner.

Thomas was my best friend, he loved gardening, the ocean, flowers and his friends an family more than anything else, he died way to young.

Today, I found out my best friend Thomas had passed away this week. I am devastated, an of course, in my mind is what if: I was there, or if I called an checked on him etc. We do not know how/why or anything. I am flying home at some point it just depends on when the funeral or memorial is, I lost it so much at work, I had to come home.

I remember the first time I met Thomas at the "Floodtide", in Mystic, CT our first Sunday together Brunch. We drank Champagne and laughed, went to a thirft store and bought cowboy hats then went to the Casino an walked around, an made fun of ourselves in our best southern accents.

We lived together for awhile an had parties, dinner parties, friends/lovers in an out of the house. We had our fights but were always there for each other. Thomas even had themed clothes the Orange cargo pants that seemed to be on him for a whole month. Our the times he would dress in one color and call himself whatever color he was wearing.

Our famous Thanksgiving dinner with 20 people, our the Christmas drinking a whole bottle of Tequila, or going to AJ's for brunch on New Years Day with Bloody Mary's to help us through our already foggy heads. I love Thomas an will miss him terribly when it finally sinks in, at this point I still can not get my head around it.

When someone dies, why are we so selfish we think, how does it affect me? I want to know why, how was he feeling, did he know? I have all my memories and pictures from our time together. Our trip to Savannah for his 30th birthday, or in Providence on my brother's 30th, where Thomas was on the floor with the Techno music, still dancing when he fell an was stepped on. His smile, his kindness, his love for his friends. Thomas you are badly missed.

http://www.puatraining.com/index.html

This guys blog, is so funny!! He is going to help you pick up women. There is even a show on TV now on how to pick up women?

Are men having a hard time out there? SHOCKER!! So, for all you men out there having problems you may want to look at this guys blog or watch TV so realistic..

I understand how Barnes & Noble, do not want to carry the book. On the flip side, Good for you Mr. Goldman for trying to actually recoup the money that was awarded you in Civil Court, since the Criminal court case was a joke an let him off, even if we all know HE DID IT!!

As long as OJ is not getting anything from this book, go for it. Maybe we can finally find out what happened to Nicole and Ron. What do you think?


From Fox News.
NEW YORK — If you're hoping to buy O.J. Simpson's "If I Did It," don't expect to find a copy at Barnes & Noble.
Citing a perceived lack of customer interest, the chain said the book would only be available by special order or for purchase online through Barnes & Noble.com.
"Our buyers don't feel there will be enough of a demand to carry it in our stores," Barnes & Noble spokeswoman Mary Ellen Keating told The Associated Press on Tuesday.

A rival chain, Borders Group Inc., said Tuesday that it would stock "If I Did It," a fictionalized account of the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman. But spokeswoman Ann Binkley said Borders "will not promote or market the book in any way."

Simpson's book was originally scheduled to be published last November by ReganBooks, an imprint of HarperCollins, with an announced printing of 400,000. But "If I Did It" was dropped in response to widespread outrage. ReganBooks founder Judith Regan was later fired and her imprint disbanded.

Last month, a federal bankruptcy judge awarded rights to the book to Goldman's family to help satisfy a $38 million wrongful death judgment against Simpson.

Beaufort Books, a small New York-based publisher, is reissuing "If I Did It" in October, with Simpson's original manuscript intact and commentary included. The Goldman family is calling the book Simpson's confession -- the same description Regan offered in justifying the original publication.

Denise Brown, Nicole Brown Simpson's sister, has accused Goldman's father, Fred Goldman, and other family members of hypocrisy for publishing a book that he had called "disgusting and despicable" when Simpson first planned to publish it.

Simpson has maintained his innocence in the 1994 killings in the Brentwood section of Los Angeles. The former football great, who now lives near Miami, was acquitted of murder in 1995.

I want to give a shout out to my friend Thomas, who is having a rough time right now. Just know you have friends that care about you, and take your time getting back into the work force. Take care of yourself, everything else will still be there, you are more important than anything, and I would hate for anything to happen to you. I wish I wasn't so far away but this hug is for you...

I went to my 3rd interview for the position in Charleston,SC, I have not seen the property yet. My next interview will be more intense it will be a "Day in the life", I like the reasoning behind it, they want to make sure you are a good fit, an that they are a good fit for yourself. Companies spend so much money to get the right person in positions, an it does not always work out. This way, it is a win-win for both to make sure it is the right decision. I have never been one to shy away from work or a challenge, but part of me is already thinking this is not the job for me. I am trying to keep an open mind until my next "test" or interview whatever you want to call it.

It is coming down to the wire on if we are staying or going, we have to sign our new lease in two weeks. My husband has been wonderful and will go wherever I get a job, he is so supportive of anything I want to try. I am not even insecure anymore, its more what do I want out of my life? Is this going to improve our quality of life?

NERVES!! My nerves are shot. I have my next interview tomorrow morning and have been stressing since I found out on Saturday. I am glad it will be over before the weekend. We are going down to Charleston,SC on Saturday morning to see if it is a place we would like to live. Just in case they offer the job, but we are now not so sure. I did my Pro/Con list, and we found out yesterday it will be a pay decrease for me, but on the other hand it will be a job promotion with a little more potential.

Are we all like this when we are the crossroads of our lives? Luckily, my husband is looking at it objectively and calmly and helping me get ready for the interview. I hate Interviews, you want to come off in the best light, but you really never know what they are looking for, or what you say wrong that could change the whole outlook. My heart still is hoping in the next few weeks something will break up in New England for us to move back up there. But I don't want to hold off on our life it doesn't materialize, we have to make a decision in the next few weeks because our lease is up an we will have to resign it or move out.

DECISIONS?? DECISIONS?? How do you all feel about them? That is what is so hard, you want to make the right one, not one you will have to just live with until something else changes your life. My job now, may be boring but it pays well for the lack of actual work I do in a single day. Granted when I have large groups I am running, which starting on the last week, until the middle of September I will be running, I have (4) High Maintence groups back to back. It would be nice to be busy again an not have to worry about anything except driving to the Wedding at the end of September an our trip in March 2008.

According to National Geographic magazine, Mystic CT is a perfect place, to live, work and play. YEAH!! My adopted hometown is fabulous. I miss Mystic, I am looking forward to our next trip up north end of September for a friends wedding. I am excited because it will be fall in CT which is fun, you get to wear a jacket and smell the difference from Summer to Fall.

Down here not so much. I am not making any plans to see my friends because last time it was all friends and not much family. I am going to see my family on Friday night hopefully, because the wedding is on Saturday, which is funny it will be my sister Lynne's "23rd wedding anniversary. My friend Kimberly is getting married on the same date and the same place, the Spa at Norwich Inn, which is where I was married in March 2005. It was also, where I worked as the Wedding Specialist, so it will be fun attending the wedding which is not mine and I am not working either.

I am still very nervous about my interview on Friday but looking forward to the next step to see where it might take me in my career. I realize it is a crossroads if they offer the position, but for now I am just brushing up on my interview skills, I bought a new suit (of course) have directions to where the interview is an just wishing Friday was over with, bad attitude?

My husband and I are might be on the move again! Even further South, I am interviewing for a position in Charleston, SC, I have already had (2) my third interview is this Friday at 10am. I am glad it is in the morning, even though since it is at the end of the week, I will be stressing about it all week. This position will be a huge boast for my career.

As I have been imagining what this position will entail and I look at my position now, I am scared. This is a Assistant General Manager of a hotel position, I know I can do the job if they give me the tools, which since they have a 4 week training for it, I believe they will. Will I be a good boss? The few times I have been the "boss" it was when someone else didn't show, or in a restaurant where I moved my way up in the ranks so everyone knew me. My husband of course, is being very supportive and can not understand where my insecurities are coming from. This is from a man who never seems to have any doubt in his abilities.

I have been in the Hospitality Industry well over 20 years, and have always wanted to move out of the sales office but never thought it might actually come to it. That someone might be willing to take a chance on me, is so weird to me. I mean it might not happen, an I realize it, so I am trying not to get excited. We are taking a trip down to Charleston this weekend just in case, I have not been there in 15 years, since we picked my brother up on Paris Island when he got out of boot camp. My husband, has never been there. I really wanted to move back to New England, but Charleston is suppose to be beautiful an it is on the water, BIG THING FOR ME!!

When you have never been farther than 1 hour from the Ocean, being 5 hours away is so hard. The Ocean has always been good for me, an these last 2 years being so far an not really going to beach at all, has stunk. I know my family really wanted me closer to home, but if this position works out in another year, I could be promoted to General Manager an would be moving yet again, if we are lucky it will be a position in New England. At my age, how many more chances do you get? It is funny, when I worked for the Hilton in Mystic, CT an we had a female General Manager, I remember getting a bit tipsy at a work function and telling her that someday I wanted her job.

Now, if someone told me they aspired to that, I would be flattered and take them under my wing and show them how to achieve that goal, nope she rarely talked to me again. My gosh, I was a room service server, it is not like I was moving into that position the next day. I have worked almost every department since I started in this career, so I am going to bring my background to make a difference. If this happens, I am sure I will have even more stories from the South. If not, we will be in Winston Salem another year before we are moving again.

Heat!! I can not believe how hot it is outside. Yesterday, when I got into my car it was 106' on the Temp. Gage, YEAH!! The heat and humid is making me feel worse than ever, now tomorrow a cold front is moving in it is suppose to get down to 89'-90', some cold front. In Mystic, CT is is currently 57' with rain storms. Why can't we get that? Washington DC is 92' with isolated Thunderstorms, and in Chicago, IL 87' partly cloudy an in Key West, FL it is 97' but feels like 103', the furthest south an now North to Portland, Maine is is 78' cloudy. I talked to my mom an yesterday in Portland was beautiful the heat broke and they are having a great weekend.

WEATHER:

A heat advisory means conditions will be too warm to allow the body to cool off and heat-related illness may occur, according to the National Weather Service's website. u think it is worse than past years for the weather? I do,


The weather center also warned against leaving pets or very young children in cars, "even with the windows slightly open because the temperature inside the car can quickly climb to 135 Fahrenheit" (57 C).

The Tennessee Valley Authority (TVA), which provides electricity to seven of the states affected by the heatwave, reported a record demand for power as residents switched on air conditioners. "On Tuesday, we set a new record of 32,888 megawatts and we could have a new peak today (Wednesday), depending on if we get late afternoon showers," TVA spokesman Gil Francis told AFP. "The temperature is supposed to be one degree more than yesterday, when it was in the mid- to upper 90s. And that's where it's supposed to stay for the week, so peak demand will be over 32,000 megawatts all this week."

In Washington, five air conditioned "cooling centers" opened to provide relief for the homeless. "We are also handing out water to homeless people on the streets," Rosalind Redmond of the Washington Shelter Hotline told AFP. The Washington DC Housing Authority (DCHA) opened the geysers on fire hydrants at city-run housing developments. "We have 'street showers' in housing developments where there are lots of kids," Dena Michaelson, director of public affairs for DCHA told AFP as she returned from inspecting one of the gushing sources of relief from the heat.

Temperatures in Washington are forecast to reach 102 Fahrenheit (38.8 C) by Sunday. The high temperatures have been caused by "warm humid air reaching northward from the Gulf of Mexico, and a warm air mass in place over the east. The dry ground conditions of the drought that has affected some places contribute to creating higher temperatures," Hedge said.

One of the areas hit by drought was the Tennessee River Valley, which has seen the lowest level of rainfall in 118 years, according to the TVA. then again I have thought over the years, and the older I get the more I am bothered by the heat.

When I was a kid, I remember being outside playing, running through the sprinkler or slip an slide, was always fun even water balloons anything to cool off. If it rained my best friend Melissa an I would go out an stomp in the puddles even sit in them an just not care that we are soaking wet it was a challenge to stay cool. We did not grow up with a/c, if we went to the beach my mother would draw all the curtains in the house, an have the fans pointing in the living room, that way when we got home it would be cool. In our Living room we had a big picture window so without the curtains drawn it would be like a sauna in there.

The best part of the picture window was if it was a good rain, lightening storm we would turn off everything electric (back then people were worried) and sit on the couch and watch the storm. I love rain storms even today, that is most likely why, my mom always made it fun not scary. I think as I have gotten older my body can not adjust to the heat, an I think it is worse than ever but most likely it is the same as it has always been. I have to remember back to when I was kid, to know August no matter where you are is ALWAYS HOT!!

Yeah, I feel bad for Kail going on Big Brother 8 but am so glad Eric is left. Now, who do I want out of the Big Brother 8 house? Amber (explained below) and Dick, because I want to see if Danielle can stand on her own two feet without her 'DADDY" or her boy toy, "NICK" especially since she is a child herself.

You supposedly, have a "boyfriend" who you live with was your "stuff" with Nick just a game or are you so fickle that a cute boy can change how you feel about your boyfriend?

Evil or Dick whatever he is called, is my age an he plays the game all men at that age play, that you are inferior an he is better than you, realize most of the time they are just as f**** up as the rest of us. He just hides it better than women.If Danielle was not in the game I think watching Dick an his mind games would of been quite interesting to watch. Being "43" I like watching him play the game an so many of people in the house falling for it, he is putting it out there an since most are in their 20's they do not appreciate as much as I do watching him.

See Below why I want Amber Gone, Dustin should watch out, how far are the gays behind the Jews? Being a Fag Hag from way back, just a thought.

FOX NEWS, Tuesday, August 7, 2007

But two nights ago on CBS' overnight feed on Showtime Networks, a player named Amber Siyavus Tomcavage stirred things up. The 27-year-old Las Vegas cocktail waitress must have forgotten that the cameras were on when she — under her breath — had a long discourse with housemate Jameka about "the Jews." Her mother must be so proud.

The essence of Amber's complaint? That Jews she has met are "bad" people, and you could tell them by either their noses or their names.

Jameka, who professes to be a Christian, made no reaction to Amber's declaration. None of the footage has been shown on CBS' broadcast so far, but it's all over the Internet.

Amber's exact statement: "The majority of people I know from New York are Jewish, and the majority of Jewish people I know, my gosh, so many are so selfish. So weird. Even my sister always tells me, she's like my sister, and my mom will meet someone and I'll be like, 'I don't like that person. That person doesn't seem like a very good person to me,' and my mom and sister are like, 'You know why?' Why? 'They're Jewish.' How do you know? 'Amber you can tell by their last name, you can tell by their nose.' I'm like, 'Really?'"

There is at least one Jewish player in the house, Eric Stein, also 27, of New York. Stein was made "America's Player" when the game began — a secret unbeknownst to the other players — and should win barring any surprises. His main quality has been that he is the least offensive of the group.

And what a group they have been. There's a 44-year-old father who looks like Tommy Lee. His pretty, blond, undernourished 20-year-old estranged daughter is in the house as well. She had a thing with a 25-year-old hunky failed football player (since evicted) who also flirted with the other men and talked about having gay sex.

Only one half of another gay couple is left. They were actually former lovers, but not before we learned the now-evicted one gave the other an STD.

Is this America? No. These are people whose lives are so pathetic and desperate that they want to be on TV 24 hours a day.

I think the world is going crazy, the other day on the news I saw how 3 young people were shot execution style in Newark, NJ. There were 4 shot, 1 survived, but the other 3 unfortunately did not, they were just hanging out. According to news reports these 4 young people were going or returning to college in the fall. They were trying to make something of their lives, so sad. Well today, they arrested two people of this horrible crime, an I have attached the article from the Fox News.

NEWARK, N.J. — A suspect in the execution-style killings of three students surrendered Thursday to Newark Mayor Cory Booker less than an hour after the mayor announced a warrant for the man as well as the arrest of a 15-year-old.
Jose Carranza, 28, whose fingerprints were lifted from a bottle, turned himself in after three college students were shot dead at close range on Saturday and a fourth was hospitalized. Carranza's attorney called Booker to arrange the surrender.

“He said, ‘Mr. Mayor, we’d like him to be turned in directly to you,’” Booker said Carranza's attorney told him.
On Wednesday night, police arrested a 15-year-old boy who along with Carranza is accused of murder, attempted murder, robbery, weapons offenses and conspiracy to commit the crime of robbery, Essex County Prosecutor Paula Dow said.
Dow said she doesn't believe there is any familial relationship between the two in custody.
The teen, who is Hispanic, is an American citizen with a Newark address, Booker said.

“I don’t think words can describe the level of emotion I feel,” he said of the crimes.

We will confirm that there are others we are looking for," he said, adding, "I am confident all the suspects in this investigation will be apprehended."
A silent Carranza held his attorney's hand during his surrender.

“He simply came forward," Booker said. "He said nothing. We put him in handcuffs."

The sole survivor of Saturday night's shootings, 19-year-old Natasha Aeriel, provided information from her hospital bed after being shot in the head.
Aeriel was with her brother, Terrance Aeriel, 18; Dashon Harvey, 20; and Iofemi Hightower, 20, who were forced to kneel against a wall and were shot execution-style outside a Newark school.

The students had been planning to attend the Delaware State University.
Booker earlier had announced a $150,000 reward for information leading to the capture of Carranza, who they say has three prior arrests and one pending trial.

Why was he out without 3 priors and a pending trial? My heart goes out to the families of Terrance an Natasha Aeriel, Dashon Harvey and Iofemi Hightower, they did not deserve this to happen to them. They were hanging out something we have all done in the summers when were young. What is going on in the world, there was another home invasion this week luckily the family got away with no injuries.

Is it that fact that criminals can get away with so much these days an never spend a day in jail? Or like the rapist who got out after 6 months, he committed the crime 23 years ago then when he was in AA he wrote a letter to his victim and apoligzed, then went to jail but since it happend 23 years ago, that is the length of his sentence they went by. I am sure his victim feels victimized again by the system. If someone is without a doubt guilty sentence them to the extent of the law, if they have committed murder, sentence them to death. Why do they deserve to be alive when they took an innocent life? Why should tax payers pay for them to sit in a jail cell? I am talking about the people who are either caught redhanded (CT CASE) or have admitted their guilt.

Case of: Joshua Komisarjevsky, who turns 27 Friday, and Steven Hayes, 44, are charged with six counts of capital felony as well as murder, larceny, robbery, sexual assault, burglary, kidnapping and arson. If convicted on all counts, the two career criminals could each face a possible death sentence.

They were in court today, with their attorney's Joshua with Jermiah Donovan and Hayes with Thomas Ullman here are these two attorney's track record:

Tuesday's brief court appearance was noteworthy for the two high profile defense attorneys who entered the case. Donovan, who is representing Komisarjevsky, and Public Defender Thomas J. Ullmann, who is representing Hayes, have made a living punching holes in seemingly air-tight prosecutions.
Both men are well-known for passionate courtroom oratories that have persuaded juries to go easy on their clients.Donovan is perhaps best known for his successful defense of Heather Specyalski, who was acquitted and spared a possible 25-year prison sentence on a manslaughter charge in 2003.Specialski was the girlfriend of multimillionaire businessman Neil Esposito, 42, who was killed in a drunk-driving accident on Route 9 in 1999.

Donovan, citing Esposito's partially-clad body and other evidence found at the scene of the crash, argued that Specialski couldn't haven't been driving the car because she was in the passenger seat performing a sex act. In what some later called the "Lewinsky defense" after former White House intern Monica Lewinsky, the argument was enough to give a jury reasonable doubt.

In 2001, Donovan saved Gregory "Coyote" Pierre's life by successfully persuading a New London jury to convict Pierre on a lesser charge of manslaughter rather than murder and capitol felony for his roll in the beating death of James "Capt. Jim" Connor of Essex.

Ullmann is the only defense attorney to have ever clashed with Dearington on a death penalty case prior to this one - and Ullmann won. When Dearington decided to bring his first death penalty case against accused multiple murderer Jonathan Mills in 2000, Mills was charged with the brutal slashing deaths of Katherine "Kitty" Kleinkauf, 43, and her two children Kyle Redway, 4, and Rachael Crum, 6.Ullmann argued that Mills, a cocaine addict, was intoxicated when he gave a confession and not properly advised of his rights. Although Mills was ultimately convicted in the murders, he was spared a death sentence after Ullmann successfully persuaded a judge to allow Mills to make a rare, unsworn statement directly to jurors. In his statement, Mills apologized and spoke of how he was tormented by the deaths every day. It was enough to spare the defendant his life.Besides representing countless defendants in murder and other serious felony cases over the years,

Ullmann also represented former Branford First Selectman Anthony "Gene" Bontatibus on arson-murder charges in connection with the 1996 Thanksgiving fire that killed local firefighter Edward "Eddie" Ramos in 1996. The case ended in 2001 after five years, three trials and two hung juries. Dearington finally gave up and dropped the charges.

In the present case, state law requires evidentiary hearings - known as probable cause hearings - for any defendant charged with a crime punishable by life in prison or death. In Connecticut, those charges are murder and capitol felony. Probable cause hearings must be held within 60 days of formal criminal charges being filed." HARTFORD COURANT

Now, you have to wonder if Dearington is up for this trial, he has not done very well against these two men before, we need someone who will fight tooth and nail to convict these men that were apprehended at the scene in the car, it would be horrible if these men got off on a something stupid just so they can get out again an hurt more innocent people. Write your letters to the District Attorney's an make sure the right Lawyer is on the Case..

I am a huge Big Brother fan, I have watched every season since Season 2, and last night, I was appalled and ticked off.

How to ruin the game by flying a plane over the house to call out Eric ( America's Player) and Amber (CRYING GIRL), I find it so wrong. This is a game, why not let them play the game with their own rules and beliefs, why help them? I feel whomever friends that flew the plane should be disqualified. You are supposely, not to have any outside contact with the real world, so how could this have happened.

If you are confused by what I am saying, I will tell you as the Big Brother people were competeing for Head of Household, a plane flew over with a banner, that said, " We love Nick ( who was evicted) and Eric and Amber are liars." Eric is playing the game for America we get to give him assignments, and who to get nominated for eviction and who to vote for during the eviction. It has been so much fun, watching him do all the assignments and try to change the tide of who goes home. He really wanted Nick out of the house, but America wanted Kail, so he had to vote against his own alliance. He has been so much fun to watch this whole time, an was keeping under the radar. Now, Danielle and Dick (father/daughter) are in control this week and she needs to get out of there, or Dick one of the other, because their alliance is hurting the house.

I really want Dick out to see if Danielle can stand on her own two feet, he likes the mind games he plays and since everyone is so much younger they are falling for it, I am disappointed in Kail for actually letting him inside her head. He is a game player and she is a bit older an a mom, play him right back. I think Big Brother Producers should find out how that plane got there an who was behind it and act, because it would stink if Americas' player got outed so early in the game. We liked having some control in a show we love. I realize Danielle nominated Kail and Jennifer for the 3rd week, but she is feeling confidant that one of them will get the Power of Veto and then she will backdoor Eric in that spot and get him out of the game. Eric better get in there an get the POV and then get the next HOH competetion. Danielle is a bitch who needs to be taken down a peg or two, it would be better with out her dad Evil Dick, to help her out to see if she could do it on her own. Because then her two allies, Dick and Nick are both gone. She is a pretty girl who always let men help her, kind of like Blanche Dubois of "Streetcar named Desire" honey beauty fades then what do you have?

You know your in the south when:

Today, my boss asked me to accompany her to a place to pick up some 'tiles' for her upcoming group. Tiles you put on the floor of bathrooms, kitchens etc, are nice an in the food business we can use for displays of food to bring it up a notch. So, she had called a place and the man said, I have a warehouse full of tiles an gave us the address.

We pull up an it is at the end of dead end, down a little dirt road to a trailer, which is his "warehouse" in front of his house, which has a truck with the hood up, a shack, two more cars without plates and looked like did not work. Also, was a little pile of wood that it looked like was ready for the barn fire to begin at any moment. To say the least, we were a bit nervous, then he comes up the hill from his house which you can not see, and he was so pleasant an nice. The tiles were under the trailer not even in it. We got a great deal, my point is not up north will you find this, when people say warehouse they usually mean a structure of solid walls.

I was laughing so hard, it is such a southern thing to see this, an being a snob from the North, I had to mention the set up. This man, had a beautiful house in the woods it was just what you first see that makes me laugh.

The hotel is in a middle of a Huge Conference we do every two years it is called the National Black Theatre Festival and it draws huge crowds. I am amazed at how many people come out for this I am meaning 1000+ people. This festival has over 100 performances in 7 days that is amazing, the founder had passed away a few months ago, so it is extra special.

What is amazing to me, is how some people think there is racial tension, or that people are treating them badly due to skin color. That is not what I have seen, we have been proactive to make sure everything runs smoothly, and I don't think it has anything to do with color of skin it is the Massive amount of people!! Any crowd that huge has to be controlled no matter skin color. Every night seems like New Years Eve, people are hyped up, going from venue to venue enjoying the music and the alochol. We are using plastic in order for them to go throughout the complex, because of the marble floors and how dangerous if glasses are broken and how it would make it more dangerous to stop and have to clean up the glass all over the floors.

The police presence is again, for crowd control. I worked on Monday night an some people were rude but nothing more so than normal, alot of our clients are rude!! I wish people would stop trying to make this into anything except a celebration of the arts in Winston Salem, and how wonderful it is for the city.

How very sad about the bridge collapsing last night in Minneapolis. They said, this morning on the news there are at least 20 cars in the Mississippi River an they expect more causalities. My heart goes out to the families looking for their loved ones. When you drive into work everyday do you think about the bridges you might be traveling over and if they are safe?

I do not usually but of course, today I did and I pass over 3 an none over water, all over other highway, I am not sure which scares me more if it was over water or the highway because more people could be hurt that way. Also, it makes me realize how short life is and that I really need to be closer to my family. I miss my mom more than anything, I am not a momma's girl but she was/is always there for me and I want to be able to go over for dinner or a glass of wine and participate in all family functions. I have missed out on so much in the last 2 years.

My friends have moved on to other friends (rightly so) so when I see them I feel like a third wheel who they feel obligated to see when I am in town. Some call me once in awhile but that is about it. I know when my friend Thomas was in Texas he felt left out of our lives. He used to call and sometimes I would be so busy I could not talk, how bad is that? You do not realize how disconnected you feel being so far away from people for extended periods of time. My husband an I are now making a real effort to try to move back to New England. Not Connecticut still way too expensive, but now looking at New Hampshire, Maine and part of Mass. I realize Mass is just as expensive as CT, an I would prefer to live in New Hampshire an if need be commute to Mass for work. It is hard not to get my hopes up in this regards, because our Head Hunter seems so positive (which is a good thing), I am just for now not telling my family or friends do not want to get anyone's hopes up and then it doesnt' happen. I keep thinking it would be great to be home for Christmas for good, instead of having to leave Christmas Day to come back to North Carolina.

I love where we live now, an North Carolina has a lot to offer people but it is not home to me, New England is home. This Yankee needs to be back in the North.

Well, I know I have not written much this week, but I was so upset in regards to the murder in CT, I decided to take a rest from my soap box.

I was contacted by a head hunter this week and am now trying to move back to New England. I have also involved my husband and he is interviewing with her via phone today. My goal is to get to New Hampshire or Maine. I need to be closer to my family an friends. I have not really told them yet, because it may not happen. She is not guaranteeing me a position she is trying, since I do not have to pay her an the company does, I figure it is better than having to do all the leg work myself.

There are a few positions that would be perfect for my husband so if he gets one first, it does not matter, as long as they relocate us. My dream would be by Christmas, but I am basically taking it just one day at a time. I do admit I love the weather in the south year round, but I want to be by the water not 5 hours and closer to my family an friends.