I have not been able to get the tragedy of last Friday out of my mind.  I believe in God but have been very lax to say the least, but over the past week I have found myself needing something, so I have begun praying and talking to God. Last night, I went to a Candlelight Vigil one of my co-workers asked what is the point of a Candlelight Vigil? I had to think about it, and truly did not know how to answer except to say, people need to feel connected to other people in this crazy world and especially the tragedy that took place in Connecticut. 

I am not sure if I was right or wrong on my answer, but I did feel a bit better standing in a circle and praying to God.  When I got home it just would not leave me this feeling that there is more to this world than the here and now.  I could not sleep well last night, and really not for the end of the world thing for the fact next week is Christmas and the families who have presents that will never be opened, the smiling faces of their children when they see "Santa" has come will not happen no kodak moment, there will be an empty spot at the Christmas dinner table,it is overwhelming to me the grief those families are feeling.

I keep listening to the debate about Gun Control Laws, no offense to anyone but when someone has it in their mind to committ this horrible act and they have a gun, they are going to do it no matter what the law says.  He was mentally ill, so why not instead of putting more gun laws on the books, we put money into Mental Health?  I read that his mom was planning on moving across the country to get him help, was there no place closer?  Was he ever on medication and then due to being "20" in the minds of the law means he can make his own decisions?   I know this debate will keep going on, but I feel our resources should be to help this unstable people more then gun laws.

A few years ago, I wrote a letter to the editor of a local paper in regards to more laws and boy was I naive, I got lambasted on the subject.  I truly believed all the senseless killings would stop with more gun laws.  I now see the issue is more deep, and we must look at what makes these young people snap and committ such horrible crimes.

Should children be so medicated from the time they start school that when they reach the age of 18 they can now make their own decisions and do not want to feel a bit off, or out of it, they go off their meds and how do you treat and "adult" who feels they know themselves best?  I am not pretending to know the answers to any of this, I am just trying to find a  meaning to these senseless acts.

My open prayer to God:
Dear God,
There are no words to say  how saddened the world is from the Tragedy of December 14, 2013 at 930am in Newtown,CT.  I ask that you embrace all these angels who were just living their lives an they were cut down too early, they need your love right now.  They will be scared and not understanding why they can not see their parents any longer.  We still here are trying to grasp how to go on and figure it out, which may never happen.  We love all these lost souls, and pray they are in your loving arms. 

Amen.