Saturday, August 30, 2008

Work has been very stressful lately, and not due to the actual clients which believe me in the wedding business can be a bit much. It is with a few of my bosses. One makes me feel smaller than dirt most of the time, never a kind word, judging my contracts. When I was hired it was take what we can, and then a good business came along for 2009, and the person who’s son is getting married is huge in the Hospitality Business, so it made since to accept the business.

The next is my General Manager who I like and respect as a Manager, but he has been treating me as if I suck and why am I even here, and I do not do enough for the company. I know it is not just me and maybe I am a bit sensitive.

My husband has taken a job here to ensure my success at work, and I feel people do not like that, even though he has been my lifesaver all summer, he is not as sensitive, but I take offense when his boss, sends nasty emails and talks behind his back as if and idiot and not 10x smarter than her.

The third is the worse, he is my superior, but I have absolutely no respect for him. He talks down to everyone, kissing the bosses butt so far, he supposedly can do ‘no’ wrong, he has offended a few of my clients, and gets some nasty comment cards, dresses like a slob even in a suit. He comes at me, and screams at me in front of people, then makes comments about my professionalism. He has had me in tears a few times, not that I have shown him, I go in the other room, why give him that satisfaction?

My direct boss actually watched him come barreling around the corner and screaming in my face, not that she said anything, my husband keeps telling me to stand up for myself but I do not think it would change anything. I do have every time it has happened documented, I have no idea why but it makes me feel better to write about it. One time, he called my house and yelled and screamed into my answering machine ruined my whole weekend, because my clients misunderstood something for rooms. He changes the rules for the rooms midway through our booking process.

I feel as if I am spinning my wheels, I have heard that the person before me, did not like all the fights between departments and the stress was too much, I now see what she is talking about, if you want good sales people, and hard workers you need to give them some encouragement and let other departments know they can not talk to other employees that way. Now, I am just keeping my mouth quiet, not bonding with anyone and just doing my job. I admit I keep my mouth shut because why cause trouble, and lose my job? I have no idea what I should do.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

This weekend at the Resort, is a very high maintence destination wedding. I have been getting myself sick stressing about it, even though they have a wedding planner, I am very nervous. Luckily, it looks like the weather is going to cooperate for Sunday.

Last weekend, I had (2) Weddings and they both went perfectly, and the weather was perfect. The only hiccup was the groom from Sunday's wedding, he was 24 years old, and could not handle his booze. The wedding ended at 10pm, and at 11pm he told my boss he ruined his wedding because the bartender was being responsible and shut people off, give me a break.. What got me was the Groom kept saying, " I spent $20,000 here and you should make an exception." EXCUSE ME, I did not see your name on any of the checks, you paid nothing your in-laws did and I planned the wedding with the mother of the bride in less than 6 months, so get over yourself.

He then lost his "Prada' Sunglasses and was more upset by that fact, part of me thinks he is too young to get married, but it is what it is.

This years weddings are almost over, after this weekend, I only have (4) Left, and next weekend is a high maintence bride, and the following weekend for my birthday the groom has already informed me he is a "Groomzilla", why do people think it is fun to try to make someone feel less than themselves? I work very hard at pleasing each bride, and I get stressed out making it come together for their special day, but if (1) thing goes wrong they freak out...

People spend way too much money on (1) Day, I realize that is awful since I make my living selling and working weddings, but I am amazed at how much money the bridal industry generates. When I started weddings 20 something years ago $40.00 a plate was alot, now they are more over the top then every before, and I can not stand spoiled people, who whine to their parents when they can not get what they want.

Example, yesterday, I was on the phone with a woman from NYC, who could not understand how no hair salons are open on Sunday of labor day, she needs her hair blown out for the wedding. You are in Maine, not New York give it up... The bride is upset because from today - Sunday the Hair dresser she hired for her hair can not fit her in for her 3rd trail run because the bride has decided she doesn't like the last one. Give it up, we have a life besides your wedding, which makes me wonder have you even thought of the marriage or just the "perfect wedding"?

Do people think that the "perfect wedding" will make the perfect marriage, do they even think after the wedding? When I got married my husband and I went to counseling beforehand and then read books and we work at our marriage. Oh, and no wedding is ever perfect, to me a successful wedding is when they bride and groom think it is perfect and do not know any of the mini-crisis that might have taken place.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

It is so interesting that Obama piked Biden as his running mate, 2 opposites, I wonder if they will work together or tear themselves apart from the inside.

They are not the first running mates who did not always agree, see the story below from CNN...


"Negative campaigning in America was sired by two lifelong friends, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson. Back in 1776, the dynamic duo combined powers to help claim America's independence, and they had nothing but love and respect for one another. But by 1800, party politics had so distanced the pair that, for the first and last time in U.S. history, a president found himself running against his vice president.

Things got ugly fast. Jefferson's camp accused President Adams of having a "hideous hermaphroditical character, which has neither the force and firmness of a man, nor the gentleness and sensibility of a woman."

In return, Adams' men called Vice President Jefferson "a mean-spirited, low-lived fellow, the son of a half-breed Indian squaw, sired by a Virginia mulatto father."

As the slurs piled on, Adams was labeled a fool, a hypocrite, a criminal, and a tyrant, while Jefferson was branded a weakling, an atheist, a libertine, and a coward.
Even Martha Washington succumbed to the propaganda, telling a clergyman that Jefferson was "one of the most detestable of mankind." Mental Floss: Jefferson: The sensitive writer type

Jefferson hires a hatchet man

Back then, presidential candidates didn't actively campaign. In fact, Adams and Jefferson spent much of the election season at their respective homes in Massachusetts and Virginia.
But the key difference between the two politicians was that Jefferson hired a hatchet man named James Callendar to do his smearing for him. Adams, on the other hand, considered himself above such tactics. To Jefferson's credit, Callendar proved incredibly effective, convincing many Americans that Adams desperately wanted to attack France. Although the claim was completely untrue, voters bought it, and Jefferson stole the election.

Jefferson paid a price for his dirty campaign tactics, though. Callendar served jail time for the slander he wrote about Adams, and when he emerged from prison in 1801, he felt Jefferson still owed him.

After Jefferson did little to appease him, Callendar broke a story in 1802 that had only been a rumor until then -- that the President was having an affair with one of his slaves, Sally Hemings. In a series of articles, Callendar claimed that Jefferson had lived with Hemings in France and that she had given birth to five of his children.

The story plagued Jefferson for the rest of his career. And although generations of historians shrugged off the story as part of Callendar's propaganda, DNA testing in 1998 showed a link between Hemings' descendents and the Jefferson family.

Just as truth persists, however, so does friendship. Twelve years after the vicious election of 1800, Adams and Jefferson began writing letters to each other and became friends again. They remained pen pals for the rest of their lives and passed away on the same day, July 4, 1826. It was the 50th anniversary of the Declaration of Independence. Mental Floss: The post-White House lives of presidents

John Quincy Adams gets slapped with elitism

John Adams lived long enough to see his son become president in 1825, but he died before John Quincy Adams lost the presidency to Andrew Jackson in 1828. Fortunately, that meant he didn't have to witness what many historians consider the nastiest contest in American history.

The slurs flew back and forth, with John Quincy Adams being labeled a pimp, and Andrew Jackson's wife getting called a slut.

As the election progressed, editorials in the American newspapers read more like bathroom graffiti than political commentary. One paper reported that "General Jackson's mother was a common prostitute, brought to this country by the British soldiers! She afterward married a mulatto man, with whom she had several children, of which number General Jackson is one!"

What got Americans so fired up? For one thing, many voters felt John Quincy Adams should never have been president in the first place. During the election of 1824, Jackson had won the popular vote but not the electoral vote, so the election was decided by the House of Representatives. Henry Clay, one of the other candidates running for president, threw his support behind Adams. To return the favor, Adams promptly made him secretary of state. Jackson's supporters labeled it "The Corrupt Bargain" and spent the next four years calling Adams a usurper. Mental Floss: 5 secrets left off the White House tour

Beyond getting the short end of the electoral stick, Andrew Jackson managed to connect with voters via his background -- which couldn't have been more different than Adams'.

By the time John Quincy was 15, he'd traveled extensively in Europe, mastered several languages, and worked as a translator in the court of Catherine the Great.

Meanwhile, Andrew Jackson had none of those privileges. By 15, he'd been kidnapped and beaten by British soldiers, orphaned, and left to fend for himself on the streets of South Carolina.

Adams was a Harvard-educated diplomat from a prominent New England family. Jackson was a humble war hero from the rural South who'd never learned to spell. He was the first presidential candidate in American history to really sell himself as a man of the people, and the people loved him for it.

Having been denied their candidate in 1824, the masses were up in arms for Jackson four years later. And though his lack of education and political experience terrified many Adams supporters, that argument didn't hold water for the throngs who lined up to cast their votes for "Old Hickory." Ever since Jackson's decisive victory, no presidential candidate has dared take a step toward the White House without first holding hands with the common man.

But losing the 1828 election may have been the best thing to happen to John Quincy Adams. After sulking home to Massachusetts, Adams pulled himself together and ran for Congress, launching an epic phase of his career.

During his 17 years in the House of Representatives, Adams became an abolitionist hero, championing legislation to open the debate on slavery. And in 1841, he famously put his money where his mouth was, when he defended the 39 African captives aboard the slave ship Amistad before the U.S. Supreme Court. At a time when all but two of the justices were pro-slavery, Adams won his human rights plea.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

When I was in grade school and High School, I idolized Mark Spitz, I even wrote a paper on him in high school. I was a swimmer and wanted to go to the olympics, I was never good enough but it was still a dream.

I would love to see the match up of Mark Spitz and Michael Phelps if they were both in their prime. Its wonderful to see another wonderful swimmer from the USA go for it all.

'Mark Spitz claims he could have matched fellow swimmer Michael Phelps stride for stride if the two legends swam against each other in their primes, the New York Daily News reports.

Spitz, whose 1972 record of seven gold medals in a single Olympic Games was eclipsed Sunday when Phelps won his eighth, said he thinks he'd "tie" the 23-year-old phenom.

"I think that the relationship between people that are great is they have a common thread of knowing how to beat their competitors and they know how to constantly be in shape and in top form," Spitz told the Daily News. "If that's the case, I'd know everything about how to beat Michael. He'd also know everything to beat me. We'd have to tie."

Spitz, 58, predicted Phelps could win more gold medals at the 2012 Summer Games in London.

"I believe that he can go for nine," Spitz told the paper, adding that Phelps could add the 200 meter backstroke into his regimen. "But they need to change the order in which it's participated on that particular day … so that he would have more than 27 minutes of rest."
Lighthouse Inn From the New London Day...

This is where my husband and I had our first date, and where we became engaged, sad really it is a beautiful Inn, I wish someone would spend the money and help this wonderful old property.


New London - Local health officials Wednesday closed the Lighthouse Inn because a boiler malfunction left the Guthrie Place hotel without hot water.

Managers for the inn, which has been beset by lawsuits and financial difficulties, told health inspectors they expected to repair the boiler and reopen today, said Stephen Mansfield, deputy director of health for the Ledge Light Health District.

Mansfield said the landmark inn hasn't been operating since last week, when district sanitarians responded to two separate, anonymous complaints about the lack of hot water. District sanitarians Wednesday afternoon delivered a public-health order, closing the inn until managers can show the district they have hot water.

In July, New York lender Business Loan Center Inc. said it planned to foreclose on the inn's $1.84 million mortgage, the latest in a series of debt collection actions by the inn's various creditors, including the U.S. Internal Revenue Service, the state Department of Revenue Services and several of the inn's suppliers.

- KEVIN DALE


New London

Monday, August 18, 2008

Its been almost a year since my friend Thomas passed away, it is amazing to me it is a year, since I got the news. I still can remember the screaming in my head, and almost collapsing at work. My friend Claudette and I talked about getting together, but I am so busy at work, it is not possible. So, now I am on line trying to find a girls weekend somewhere in New England for her birthday and mine in October when work will not be so crazy...

I wish I was planning it for the 3 of us, we went to Boston for my birthday a few years ago, and we had so much fun, we would all make a point at Christmas to see each other, even when I moved out of state, I would come back to Mystic, to see my family and friends. This last year, has been such a changing time for myself. After Thomas death, I worked so hard to get back to New England and after making it through a long, snowing winter in the backwoods of Maine, now that the resort is open, I think now in terms of when it is closing, 10 weeks by the way. My summer is over, I have 2 weddings this weekend, then next weekend another HIGH MAINTENCE Mother of Bride, and event after event for all these people starting August 30 - September 1, I am very much looking forward to September 1 afternoon.

When you are younger your summer seems to endless, but in the adult world and hospitality world, it is where is my next client coming in, so I can wow them and move on? Weddings bring back all my time with Thomas, and even though it is a year since his death, it still feels empty in my heart, and I miss him so much, I still pick up the phone to call him, when something happens that I think he would understand or at least put in prospective. As I get older, it is amazing to me, how many people I have lost that I really care about. I will always miss Thomas.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

I saw this from the New London Day, and printed it because the economy is so scary these days, and my heart goes out to restaurant workers, they seem to be one of the hardest hit when people cut back.

"The gas crunch is taking a bite out of lunch crowds in the region as more workers brown-bag it to cut expenses.

Monica Harsmanka of Waterford, who works at Electric Boat, has a short commute, but filling up her Ford Explorer is taking its toll, she said. She says she eschews the workplace cafeteria now in favor of garden salads and leftovers from dinner.

”I just started doing it for the past month or so to cut corners,” Harsmanka said. “I almost died when I filled the gas tank. I mean, $85 - it's ridiculous. You can't go anywhere.”

Meanwhile, Monica's State Street Diner, a longtime breakfast and lunch diner in downtown New London, has had to resort to sending waitresses home early over the past month. And business partners at Pizza Grotto in Groton, which opened nine months ago, laid off two workers and are handling the mealtime rush by themselves.

Chris Zingus, co-owner at Pizza Grotto, said customers come in apologizing for cutting back from several days a week, partly because they're brown-bagging it on the other days.

”We've also noticed that a lot of offices that used to send out for big orders to be delivered - doctors' offices, you name it - they used to do it once a week, now they do it twice a month,” Zingus said. “So that's a big thing we're missing right now.”

The trend of eating out less - which is by no means universal here in southeastern Connecticut - has been borne out by studies by the NPD Group, a consumer and retail market research firm headquartered in Port Washington, N.Y.

In two recent studies, NPD found, first, that eating out at restaurants has dropped off this year and, in findings released this week, that more people are brown-bagging it to save money and eat healthier.

Harry Balzer, NPD's vice president, says his firm's behavioral studies chronicle what surveyed participants “really do,” not what they say they'll do.

Balzer shared the report's findings, noting that last year the average American made 42 meals at home over a two-week period and brought them to work or school instead of dining out. That number was 34 meals in 2001, he said.

Those 42 meals constitute “the highest number we've seen this decade,” Balzer said. If extrapolated to cover the country's population of 300 million, it shows that 5.2 percent of “all lunches” in America are brown-bagged - “the highest it's ever been.”

Here in southeastern Connecticut, consumers frustrated with the $4-a-gallon price of gasoline and high food and utility prices are trying to save, they said in e-mails to The Day and interviews in the parking lot of ShopRite.

Patricia Williams of Groton, a secretary in a local doctor's office, brings salads to work and buys soda at the grocery store instead of at the vending machine.

Last year, “when the gas prices passed $2 and change, I started brown-bagging it,” Williams said. “Saved a whole lot. Lunch was costing $3 to $5 a day. Now it might cost me $5 a week, and I use coupons with everything, so that saves even more.”

Larry Stannard of Salem said in an e-mail that four months of brown-bagging have saved him as much as $34 a week, since he only spends $16 a week now to buy bag-lunch ingredients.

”A sandwich, a small Ziploc with some pretzels or potato chips, and a piece of fruit” is the typical menu, he said. “Water I get from the cooler in the office break room. Much cheaper and healthier. I've lost some weight, too.”

As consumers cut back, restaurants that are feeling the pinch are offering specials and trying hard to avoid a hike in prices that could, they fear, drive even more customers away.


Eds' Kitchen and Creamery in Montville is offering a different $4.99 dinner special every day and posts a message at the counter empathizing with customers' high utility and energy costs.

”Gas prices, everything's up,” said shift supervisor Robert Eccleston Jr. “They've affected the restaurant business big-time. You see the elderly people will come maybe twice a week instead of three times a week. They're cutting back.”

Monica's was paying $1.13 for one lemon. She switched markets, a move that is saving the restaurant up to $50 a week, said manager Janie Foster.

”We're really feeling it now,” added waitress Cookie Peterson. “I'm getting sent home earlier now. That's never happened before in the 5½ years I've been here. It's going to hit us all. I'm afraid what we'll see in the wintertime when the fuel prices hit.”

Spot Cafe owner Bob Dragoli said he hasn't seen a drop-off in business, but he may have to raise prices at the Groton eatery because with every food delivery there's a surcharge. But he's trying to hold off.

”Business isn't that far off,” Dragoli said, “it's just that the overhead is so much higher, and we've maintained prices. We'll see what the future brings.”

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

Work has gotten in the way of my life:

My husband is working 60 hours each week, and myself between 50-60 hours, and they are different shifts, they overlap a little so we get to see each other, but we have not been able except last weekend to spend anytime together. Last Weekend, we went to Lake Winnipeasukee with 30 other people, so lets say, we were busy, but not just us.

Work is making it hard for us to find time for each other, we have always been very dillegent about finding time for just us, in North Carolina, even with him working nights and myself days, we found at least (1) Full day just us.. We have 3 more months, our house is desperately in need of cleaning, the only thing we do daily is laundry, other than that our house looks like someone has dropped a bomb in it.

When we get home, we are both so tired, we put it off and put it off, and now it is crisis point, his mom is coming in 4 weeks and that will motivate us, but in the mean time we need to do something for the house..We have no groceries, so we are living on Hotdogs and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, we eat at work for lunch so it is whatever they prepare, which is good or we would have no variety in our diets. My husband has not cooked a meal in 2 weeks due to our schedule, who feels like cooking ( or eating) at 9pm after working all day waiting on people?

Next week, starts one of my h*** weeks, my 1st high maintence Mother of Bride checks in on Monday and the wedding is not until Saturday YUKO!! Then I have a little break, and my next high maintence Mother of Bride checks in on Wednesday, August 27 and the wedding is Sunday, August 31..Luckily both of these women have a Wedding Planner, but it will be a stressful time for me, so again my husband and I will have no "us" time. I know I am complaining and it is only for another 3 months before the resort closes, but I do wonder if our relationship can survive? It may have a few dents in it, but I have to believe we will survive.. Gosh, is it November yet?

Monday, August 04, 2008

I will admit, I am not what you would call "outdoorsy", I love any type of activity on water, waterskiing, tubing, swimming, boating etc, but that is the extend of my outdoor activity.

This weekend, we went to NH to spend the evening with my Cousin Christina and her husband Jeff on Lake Winnipesaukee, they own a summer home on Rattlesnake Island. It was a celebration of Christina's "40" Birthday, her friends from Boston came up, it was soo much fun.. My husband and I went to LL Bean last weekend, and bought ourselves a tent and other camping items for the wekend.

In order to get to the Cabin, we have to drive up to the dock and have them come over with the boat to pick us up, and you would think we were moving in with all our 'stuff', everything you need to stay outdoors. It was a lot of fun, we were on the lake most of the day, tubing (EXCITING) the water was choppy, so it made it even more exciting, my husband had never been tubing before but he seemed to enjoy himself especially when he and I were in the tube together, and I swear he was trying to knock us over..

By 7pm it was downpouring and Our tent held up beautifully, all we need for our next camp out is a air mattress or foam something, my back still hurts from sleeping on the ground, but I did not hate it, I may never camp out in the woods, I need a bathroom close by, preferable a shower too, but I can live without as long as bathrooms are close by.

I will go camping again, most likely not until October or November, due to work right now, but I can tell you we are going back to LL Bean in a few more weeks to get sleeping bags and cushions for under it, I did not complain at all, and the husband was so sweet on our way home, he took me to Sandy Point's in Alton, NH for Lobster dinner ( i think so he would not have to cook when we got home), and said, it was a treat for me sleeping in a tent with no complaints.

My last camp out was April 2003, and it was a disaster, this went so much better. I admit I can be a bit much sometimes, so I may not be "outdoorsy" but I am willing to try almost anything.

I would reccommend Lake Winnipeasukee to anyone who likes lakes and fun, there is so much to do, you can rent jet skis, etc. As we were kayaking on Sunday morning, I felt like we were in an add for New England in the summertime, it really is magical to enjoy New England in the summer. I am looking forward to the fall, which has always been my favorite time of year in New England. Especially since the rest of August, my husband and I will be working 6 days a week because of Weddings here at the Resort.

Enjoy your summer it goes way too fast.. Only 3 more months of the resort being open for the season, it certainly goes way too fast...

Friday, August 01, 2008

Here is my horoscope for today, from the New London Day of course.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Keep whatever you are doing a secret for the time being. If you are too vocal, someone will steal your idea or disrupt your plans. Focus on the future but rely on past experience to make the right choices. 3 stars

My problem is the first part, I am WAY TOO VOCAL... Work has been very strange lately, there was a comment made that most of the Salary Managers on property are working 6 days or 60 hours a week and Sales is always mentioned. Myself and my associate in my office, always pitch in when needed. I have no problem working late when I am here, I just prefer not to work on my day off if possible.

I do have some ideas in my head for my career, but to actually implement them is the part I am haveing a problem with, and I have not even talked to my husband about it. With work being strange I am keeping my mouth shut ( or atleast trying)

In August, I will be working every Sunday but one due to functions, and not taking and extra day off during the week. My husband and I now do not have any days off together until October. It has been hard working together, we both have different ideas of how I should be doing my job..

This is our last weekend away for the rest of the season, we are going to camping, yes, me camping it should be funny to watch me try to adapt to camping and pretend I am enjoying it. It will be fun because we are going to my cousins in NH and she is having an "Olympic" day for about 20 people, we have no idea what the games are but the invite said to be Prepared.. They live on a lake so I am sure water will be involved alot..